It's been a while. Been tied up with apartments exploding, band members finding their extra chromosome, and undiagnosed illnesses.
It's been a rough month and frankly I'm in a pretty shitty mood. I thought I would get back in the swing of things with a small tribute to one of the most fucked up serial killers that I've ever had the pleasure of reading about.
Mr. Albert Fish
Here's a fine sample right from the pen of the legend himself!
From a letter to ten year old Grace Budd's mother (his mispellings):
"When she saw me all naked she began to cry and tried to run down the stairs. I grabbed her and she said she would tell her mamma. First I stripped her naked. How she did kick — bite and scratch. I choked her to death, then cut her in small pieces so I could take my meat to my rooms. Cook and eat it. How sweet and tender her little ass was roasted in the oven. It took me 9 days to eat her entire body. I did not fuck her tho I could of had I wished. She died a virgin"
And from a confession of the murder of 8 year old Billy Gafney:
"Then I split the cheeks of his behind open, cut off his monkey and pee wees and washed them first. I put strips of bacon on each cheek of his behind and put them in the oven. Then I picked 4 onions and when the meat had roasted about 1/4 hour, I poured about a pint of water over it for gravy and put in the onions. At frequent intervals I basted his behind with a wooden spoon. So the meat would be nice and juicy. In about 2 hours, it was nice and brown, cooked through. I never ate any roast turkey that tasted half as good as his sweet fat little behind did. I ate every bit of the meat in about four days. His little monkey was a sweet as a nut, but his pee-wees I could not chew. Threw them in the toilet."
Before he was electrocuted, he was X-rayed and found to have dozens of needles that had been inserted over the years through his perineum. That's "taint" to you and me. What a cut-up!
Hug your kids if you have them, and if you don't, please don't eat mine.
*Note to the psychos in the audience...avoid the pee-wees*
